1. How to scare your wife by Ellen DeGeneres

    winchestersarrow:

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    (via lifeatlaaaast)

    8 months ago  /  460,391 notes  /  Source: winchestersarrow

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    8 months ago  /  205,992 notes  /  Source: man-of-prose

  3. haemat:

    things to say to bugs when science finally unlocks the secrets of human-bug communication:

    1. im not hurting you i am taking you to a safe place
    2. do you eat weird crumbs cause i found some im willing to share
    3. you can bite me if you want but id rather be no-bite friends
    4. i like your big colorful eyes, very stylish
    5. please dont crawl into my sleeves
    6. (sings a duet with a cricket)

    (via pleatedjeans)

    11 months ago  /  120,555 notes  /  Source: bwmegatron

  4. 11 months ago  /  74,452 notes

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    1 year ago  /  286,075 notes  /  Source: bonny-notion

  6. (via ruinedchildhood)

    1 year ago  /  34,313 notes  /  Source: twitterillustrated

  7. pleatedjeans:

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    1 year ago  /  13,634 notes  /  Source: pleatedjeans


  8. (via ruinedchildhood)

    1 year ago  /  235,305 notes  /  Source: montoya

  9. mesmerized

    mesmerized

    1 year ago  /  320,905 notes  /  Source: ruinedchildhood

  10. (via pleatedjeans)

    1 year ago  /  85,840 notes  /  Source: squireseses